Morning Writing

I had tried so much to keep my mind from thinking a bad way. I had tried alcohol and some drugs but that doesn't work with me. When i watched for the first time the movie Detachement, i found out that there is new ways to heal the pain, and to forget all the shit of this world. I am trying to understand the complexity of the world that we live in. Writing is an ultimate solution to defeat pain. I don't know whether this is true or not,  I will let you know. Back to the complexity of this "fucking world" that we lives in and that no one can understand. If i think correctly, the problem isn't in the world, the whole complexity resides in us. As a matter of fact i think that the best way to reduce our complexity, is by trying to inhibate some of our Human powers. So if we can shutdown the feelings, love, hate, anger, sadness ... and just live the day for the day without emotions or feelings.
Most of the people don't understand, so i will just continue by myself as i started. And why should i care about a mother's love, a woman's love a friend's love. It's all in vain no one can understand, and the people you stand for some day, let you down and leave you alone as you started.
I am No person, I have No Name, you maybe see me but i really don't exist.
This is the second part, i don't have any idea where or when did i write the first part but i like it so i will finish what i had start. To let you know, writing is definitely an ultimate solution for pain. Listening to Anouar Brahem on sunday morning is just amazing. Suddenly you start thinking about your life, your past and your future, all is the same. We are in vicious circle, we won't get out of it unless we keep our minds alive and ready to resolve problems. We have to get out of our routine. Our routine of thinking. We don't think, it's simple. We don't try to think. We don't talk to ourselves enough. Maybe we have family, friends ,job .... but in the end we still alone. And the only one that can save us in the end is ourselves.